How to Get Off an Annoying email list … Fool Proof. Guaranteed.

This is an edited extract from an article I wrote in 2004 for the Herald Sun titled ‘Why is everyone so angry all the time?’ It still seems relevent today. But the best bit is:

“Why are there so many angry people? The first reason is stress. Modern life (including wars and pandemics) is demanding what with the bills, the job, the traffic, the blood pressure pills and rushing around. Then there are the bureaucracies. Large companies today don’t listen, don’t care. You get fobbed off with recorded messages. You line up to fill your own petrol tank and then line up to pay. You can’t even get off a mailing list. This apology was printed recently in Harvard Magazine. ‘We have learned that the obituary of Erik Humphrey Gordon ’95, which appeared in the July-August ‘01 issue, was based on false information provided by the subject himself in an effort to get off Harvard’s mailing list. Mr Gordon is alive and well in New York City. We apologise for the error.’  Bravo Mr Gordon. He got imodern life namely that you have to stage your own death just to get off a bloody annoying email list!!!!!

The SPLONK Book! ….. For 4-6 year olds in Sydney. It’s free.

When Melbourne was in the long LOCKDOWN last year there were reports that some 4-year-olds were stressed. So I made this funny little ebook called SOME THINGS GO SPLONK! to help 4 – 6 year-olds in crazy times.

It’s free.

Here is Some Things Go Splonk by Kerry Cue-compressed as a pdf file. Or you can look at each page one at a time below.

Our Lockdown Playlist

2020 will have a different soundtrack for each of us. Here is the Lockdown Playlist of some of my friends.

I’m a great Musical Comedy fan and Patty La Phon is THE best. Guaranteed to make you feel great. Heather L

I hadn’t played the piano for 40 years, but during the lockdown I decided to re- learn the first two movements of Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata.After much time(of which I had plenty) and many, many  mistakes, successfully learning to play  this beautiful piano piece again has been a joyful highlight of my lockdown experience. Libby M

My soundtrack to Lockdown since August 28th 2020 has been Brahms’ Lullaby. Our fifth grandson, Zac, was born on that date. As a mother of three daughters  I thought that I was quite the expert on girls , and having five grandsons has certainly put me on  a steep learning curve since grandson number one, Alex, was born in September 2002, eighteen years ago.Since that date,  almost every nappy change that I have made for Alex, Ben, Sam, Flynn and now for baby Zac , has been accompanied by an airborne stream which the baby boys seem to delight in firing anywhere and everywhere!  Boys, but you do have to love them, don’t you!! Hence, my choice of music , 24 hours of Brahms’ Lullaby to soothe us all! Philippa Q.

Ileana G.

Elizabeth D.

When it looked as if Lockdown was here to stay some of us worried about the upcoming footy season and how it might be affected. As a Tiger supporter I’d been looking forward to some happy afternoons and evenings cheering on our  premiership team. Well, we know how that story ended with teams relocating to far away places, welcome because they bought cash and life to the far West  and North whilst we here in Melbourne suffered the indignity of becoming pariahs of the game we invented ! Interest waned as stories of bad behaviour , sad tales of families torn apart as if by war and a general malaise set in as the months wore on. My only contact was The Coodabeen Champions on Saturday mornings with stories of past players, songs of bygone eras and the wonderful talk back callers like Peter from Peterborough, Nigel from North Fitzroy and Pearl from the Peninsula.

But then came the finals with two Victorian teams fighting it out in Brisbane. On Saturday lunchtime I took a walk down Swan Street and spotted Waleed Aly and his family heading for the ‘G’, past the street where Club President Peggy O’Neil lives and suddenly Footy was alive again. It really didn’t matter who won, we were back in town and this song by Paul Kelly says it all. Melbourne was, is, and always will be the home of Aussie Rules…..Go Tiges !  Jeanette F

Ileana G.

Melbourne singer Angie MacMahon wrote this last year, but it perfectly captures the ennui of Lockdown. 500,000+ hits tells you something. Kerry C

The wonderful tenor Andrea Bocelli singing Con Te Partirò never fails to lift my spirits. It’s one of those songs which lifts the dopamine levels – just what’s been needed during lockdown. This live performance in the Piazza Dei Cavalieri, Italy in 1997 also triggers memories of a Europe we cannot visit at the moment.   Annie G

Lizzie C

Ileana G

My LOCKDOWN Life in 10 Movie Quotes

Yep! This is how exciting my life is at the moment.

The movie quotes follow the cartoons.

 My Lockdown Life in 10 Movie Quotes

1. ”I love the smell of napalm in the morning”

Lieutenant Colonel Kilgore (Robert Duvall),  Apocalypse Now (1979). He added ‘It smells like victory.’ Sounds relevant.

2. “Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

Rick Blaine, Humphrey Bogart, Casablanca (1942).

3. “I’ll be back”

Arnold Schwarzenegger, which was made famous in the 1984 science fiction film The Terminator, cyborg assassin.

4. “Go ahead, make my day”

Clint Eastwood as “Dirty” Harry Callahan, Sudden Impact, 1983.

5. “I’ll get you, my pretty, and your little dog too!”

The Wicked Witch of the West to Dorothy and her dog Toto in The Wizard of Oz, 1939.

6. ‘Carpe diem, seize the day boys, make your lives extraordinary.’

Teacher John Keating, played by Robin Williams, Dead Poets Society, 1989. 

7. ‘Shaken, not stirred’

James Bond played by Sean Connery, Goldfinger,1964.

8. “I’m gonna make him an offer he can’t refuse.”

Don Corleone played by Marlon Brando, The Godfather, 1972.

9. ‘Play it, Sam. Play ‘As Time Goes By’

Ilsa Lund played by Ingrid Bergman to the piano player, Casablanca, 1942. Humphrey Bogart played nightclub owner, Rick Blaine.

10. ‘Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people just don’t shoot their husbands. They just don’t.’

Elle Woods played by  Reese Witherspoon, LEGALLY BLONDE,2001